Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
