just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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