awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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