It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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