how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
We just shotgunned beers for America
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize