she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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