So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
