Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize