Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
