His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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