At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize