i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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