Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
