they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Randomize
