After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
