dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
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Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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