Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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