i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
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