Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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