Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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