So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
