Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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