Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
