I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
can u get pink eye on your cock?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
