There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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