I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
