just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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