Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
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you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
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I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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