how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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