The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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