im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
