she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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