The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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