yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
My dick has a subreddit
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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