hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize