"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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