OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
3 2 1 whiskey
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Randomize
