I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize