people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
