Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize