does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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