I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
