i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
