erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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