pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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