The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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