quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
