Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize