He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
