none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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