i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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